Off the Record

"I have no idea where this Best Of phenomenon came from, but it's everywhere. For whatever reasons, probably marketing and public relations, there is a compulsion to uncover and unearth the *Best in everything...books, music, cars, theaters, Web sites, even islands. Thanks to The South Whidbey Record and Whidbey News-Times, we now have the Best of Whidbey. Best of all, the newspaper folks are not telling us what's Best... they're asking our opinion. Not only that, if you turn in an entry there's a chance of winning the grand prize or several other really cool prizes. All it costs is the price of the newspaper and a first-class stamp. Short on cash? Borrow your friend's paper and send in your entry via fax or deliver it to The Record. Being a freelancer, I'm not an employee of this paper, so technically I'm eligible to enter and win... but I think that's kind of cheesy. So I'm doing my own poll...of me. OK, they're not the categories that are included in most Best Of polls (Best Italian Restaurant, Best B&B, Best Video Store, Best View, Best Bike Trail). But they are things we talk about at one time or don't like my final answers? Conduct your own Best Of poll. I guarantee you'll be happy with the results. By the way, the deadline for the real Best of Whidbey is June 2, entry per person, please! Sue Frause's *Best of South Whidbey - Party of One**Best Way to Spend a Rainy Afternoon: Reading The Record's Letters to the Editor and writing one in response (aren't you glad you live here?).**Best Police Department: A tie between the Langley Police Department and the Island County Sheriff (like I want either of them ticked off at me?).**Best Place to Find a Dead Whale: In front of a politician's house (don't they all have waterfront homes?).*Best Way to Pack a Parking Lot: Open a new Chinese restaurant...or any new restaurant (are we a hungry bunch or what?).*Best Place to Scarf Dance: Choochokam (No, Choochokam is not a Hopi Indian word for Where the scarves cling together).*Best Place to Hear Really Loud Music: Any construction site (tunes vary depending on the crew).*Best Political Sign: The barn on Langley Road that still says Scriven (what did he run for...county commissioner?).*Best Place to Gongoozle: Langley's Boy and the Dog Park (yes, that's a least in the board game Balderdash).*Best Place to Meet People on a Sunny Day: Any garden store (didn't we all used to hang out in the taverns?).*Best Place to Get Away by Yourself: The Clinton ferry line on a Sunday evening in the summer (you could easily polish off that book you've been trying to finish).*Best Place for Cell Phone Reception: Nowhere (but isn't it cool we have our own little dead zones?).*Best Place to See the Newest Cars: The Inn at Langley (forget the Seattle Auto Show!).*Best Way to Upset Your Neighbors: Put up curtains (some folks are disappointed that they can't watch our TV from the road anymore).*Best Readerboard in Recent Months: Clinton Liquor Store's salute to their Customer of the Month (I would be soooo embarrassed).*Best Feng Shui: Langley Park (yes, indeed...a feng shui expert was consulted).*Best Way to Lose Weight: Move (I have no scientific data, but it's commonly referred to as the Whidbey Ten or Whidbey Twenty, depending how long you've lived here).*Best Local Movement with a Sense of Humor: Changing the name of Freeland (I've already had my say on that topic).*Best Outlet Mall: South Whidbey garage sales (where does all that stuff come from?).*Best Place to Buy a Lawnmower: From that place up the island on Highway 525 (where do all those mowers come from?).*Best Place to Blow an Hour Out of Your Day: Your favorite grocery store (what's with the high chat factor in the produce department, anyway?).*Best Way to Tick Readers Off: Write about God, guns, dogs and politics (I speak from experience).*Best Place Off-Island to See People from Whidbey: Safeco Field and The Gorge (keep that in mind if you're thinking about doing anything weird).*Best Way to Clear a Room: Introduce yourself as a developer (does anybody see Jack Sikma anymore?).*Best Place to Run Into People on the Last Day of the Month: Whidbey Telephone Company (I'm usually there!).Sue Frause can be reached by email at"

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