Right out of the chute for 2006, let us begin with a bit of good time humor shared by pun pal Greg Barnes. Our appreciation goes out to whomever the comic was that created these observations.

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: “Does this taste funny to you?”

An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.

A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: “A beer please, and one for the road.”

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse.

“But why?” they asked as they moved off.

“Because,” he said, “I can’t stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.”

Did you hear the one about the guy who went to a seafood disco on New Year’s Eve? He pulled a mussel.

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.

Two peanuts walked into a bar.

One was a salted.

“Enough!” said the editor.

So, how was your holiday? Did you eat fruitcake? Did you drink eggnog? Were your gifts accepted with enthusiasm?

In our family, rejection comes easy. Therefore, I prefer not being nearby when the gifts I have given are opened. In fact, I stay home alone on Christmas just to avoid the possibility of my entries being ill received.

This past holiday, while my family and relatives joyously gathered across the country, I sought the solitude of my caboose to enjoy my unwrapped gift to myself, “The Amos ‘N Andy Show.”

This boxed set, available at www.tvparty.com, includes 17 DVDs containing every episode. One of the very first situation comedies, this classic originally aired from June 28, 1951 to

June 11, 1953.

Many of you may be old enough to remember the Amos ‘n Andy radio show which was also produced by Freeman Gosden and Charles Correll during the ‘40s.

In the ‘50s, Gosden and Correll, both white actors, brought the show to TV, hiring an all-black cast to portray George “Kingfish” Stevens (Tim Moore); Amos Jones (Alvin Childress); Andrew Hogg Brown (Spencer Williams, Jr.); lawyer Algonquin J. Calhoun (Johnny Lee); Lightnin’ (Horace Stewart); Sapphire Stevens (Ernestine Wade) and Sapphire’s Mama, played by Amanda Randolph. Both Wade and Rudolph also portrayed their roles on the radio version. All of the shows were filmed in front of a live studio audience of 500 people. What a joy to hear real spontaneous laughter instead of the laugh tracks we are forced to tolerate today.

According to “The Complete Directory To Prime Time Network and Cable TV Shows,” CBS Films sold the show in 1963 to Kenya and Western Nigeria. To quote authors Tim Brooks and Earle Marsh, “Soon afterward, an official of the Kenya government announced that the program would be banned in his country.

This focused attention anew on the old controversy (referring to the NAACP lobby against the show) and in the summer of 1964, when a Chicago station announced that it was resuming reruns, there were widespread and bitter protests. CBS found its market for the films suddenly disappearing, and in 1966 the program was withdrawn from sale, as quietly as possible.”

Thanks

to the digital world, many of the old TV film shows are archived and now available for the sentimental generations.

Before closing, let us share a final chortle sent me by Cousin Pat of Hood River, Oregon.

A husband was in big trouble when he forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife told him “Tomorrow there better be something in the driveway for me that goes zero to 200 in two seconds flat!”

The next morning the wife found a small package in the driveway. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Funeral arrangements for the husband have been set for this Saturday.

Jim’s columns are archived @ www.southwhidbeyrecord.com.