“Take time to look into their eyesIf you’re at all prone to tears over every little bit of Christmas sentiment, you might want to avoid reading this column because it may very well turn out to be a tear-jerker. That is not my intent, but I’m aware that it may happen anyway.I’ve just read about the shopping frenzy that began last Friday morning, with lines of people waiting at 4 a.m. to get into WalMart, for crying out loud, and I have something to say to every reader out there who has children or grandchildren and is already caught up in the pre-Christmas mania. I hope you will take this as the gentle reminder it’s intended to be, not as a Christmas bumout. My only son was born on Christmas Eve, so Christmas was always a doubly special event at our house. And, because I was one of those moms who was determined not to let the fact that I worked full time curtail in any way all the necessary Christmas activities, I spent every December going in ever more frantic circles trying to do it all, including a birthday party. Year after year, by the time Christmas Eve finally arrived, the house was beautifully decorated, piles of prettily wrapped presents lay under the tree (and in the earlier years of two children, Santa things were stashed awaiting some assembly), various dishes for our Christmas day feast were in the refrigerator and I was on the verge of exhaustion. Christmas day almost always came and went in a haze of activity and people, and when I fell into bed Christmas night, I often felt I’d missed it all.Five years ago, I lost my son. Without belaboring the point, there is no way to tell you now how much I miss him and always will, especially at Christmas. If there is one Christmas wish I have, it is that I could go back and re-do some of those Christmases when my children were small. I wish I could get back some of the time I spent trying to do too many things and instead use it to sit with them, sing with them, listen to the sound of their excited voices, read Christmas stories with them, make cookies and candy together, plan little gifts and plot surprises for each other and other family members and, on Christmas day, just sit and watch them, drink in their excitement and look, over and over again, into their eyes so that now, as the holiday approaches, I could visit that incredible storehouse of memories with no regret for the things I didn’t do, and the time I spent doing things that didn’t really matter. If only I could look into his eyes and see Christmas reflected there once more, it would be all I’d need to make it the finest Christmas ever. I understand now, thanks to him, what is truly important and try to keep it ever in mind as I look forward to Christmas with my daughter and granddaughters. And, like the spirit of Christmas past, I’d just like to remind you, too, to take time — lots of time — to look into their eyes, listen to their voices, sit with them, hug them, look at them hard and store the images in your brain. Don’t let your memories of Christmas be of how many hours you stood in line at WalMart (or anywhere else), and don’t wonder, when Christmas night comes and you fall into bed, why you hardly even recall what happened. Trust me, two days after Christmas, you will neither remember nor care about all the shopping, decorating or running around that didn’t get done or the stuff everyone got. But no amount of wishing can get back the time you didn’t spend making truly special Christmas memories with people you love.RecipesOne Christmas memory you can share with your kids is, of course, making cookies together. Cookies are always needed during the holidays, either for school parties, bazaars, gifts for teachers or neighbors, and if the kids make these, they could be gifts for grandparents. I always look for recipes that make delicious cookies but also make a lot of cookies, so the time you spend is well worth it. Such as:Butterscotch Dreams3 1/2 cups sifted flour1 t. baking powder1/2 t. salt1 cup unsalted butter, softened2 cups light brown sugar, firmly packed2 eggs1 t. vanilla1 cup finely chopped walnuts or pecans1. Sift together flour, baking soda and salt; set aside.2. In large bowl of electric mixer, at medium speed, beat butter until light. Gradually beat in sugar. Add eggs and vanilla and continue beating until very light and fluffy.3. At low speed, beat in half the flour mixture until smooth. Mix in remaining flour with hands, forming a stiff dough. Add nuts; mix well.4. Turn out dough onto a lightly floured surface. Divide in thirds. With your hands, shape each third into a roll 8 inches long. Wrap each roll in plastic wrap or foil; refrigerate until firm — several hours, or overnight. (At this point, the rolls may be kept in the refrigerator for up to 10 days, using when or as desired.) 5. With a sharp knife, cut as many 1/8-inch slices as desired for baking, re-wrapping the rest of the roll and refrigerating if not using all at once. Place slices, 2 inches apart, on ungreased cookie sheets and bake in a preheated 375 degree oven for 7 to 10 minutes, or until lightly browned. Remove to a wire rack to cool. Cookies then may be decorated with colored frosting. If you wish to sprinkle them with colored sugar or holiday sprinkles, do so while cookies are warm. Makes about 16 dozen cookies.These are equally as festive, store well and may be frozen. Make ahead while things aren’t so hectic and have ready to give or take; kids can make these easily. Holiday Date-Nut Bars1 pkg. (8 oz.) pitted dates, chopped1 cup coarsely chopped raisins1 cup chopped walnuts1 t. grated orange peel1 1/2 t. cinnamon1 cup sugar1/4 lb. unsalted butter, softened1 t. vanilla2 eggs2 cups flour2 t. baking powder1/2 t. salt2 T. orange juicePowdered sugar1. Grease 2 baking sheets; set aside. In a large bowl, stir together the dates, raisins, walnuts, orange peel, cinnamon and 1/2 cup of the sugar until all the fruit is coated with sugar; set aside.2. In a separate bowl, cream together the butter and remaining sugar and vanilla until light and fluffy. Beat in eggs 1 at a time, mixing well after each addition. Stir in flour, baking powder, salt and orange juice. Add the date mixture and stir until blended but do not overmix. Dough will be very stiff.3. Divide dough into 4 portions. Shape into 2 logs on each baking sheet, about 12 inches long, 2 inches wide and 1/2 inch thick. Bake in a preheated 375 degree oven for 15 minutes. They will be slightly browned but will feel very soft and underdone; don’t worry, they’ll firm up as they cool. Cool 15 minutes, then cut diagonally into 3/4-inch bars. Dust bars with powdered sugar. Makes 64 bars. If you freeze them or store them before using, you may wish to re-dust them with powdered sugar as some is absorbed by the bars. “