MONKEY THINK, MONKEY WRITE: My warning to the world – Rachel Ray will eat your children

The more I thought about Rachel Ray winning an Emmy, the more I thought that I needed to write a warning to the world. When my manifesto is translated into foreign tongues, I hope the children will learn. My warning to the world Rachel Ray will eat your children.

Today's cartoon is by RJ Matson for Roll Call.

Today’s cartoon for Wednesday, June 25

Today's cartoon is by RJ Matson for Roll Call.

  • Jun 26, 2008
Today's cartoon is by RJ Matson for Roll Call.

Blind support of Israel doesn’t make U.S. safer | Viewpoint

To the Palestinians who live in the occupied territories, and also the millions of Palestinians who exist as refugees, the founding of Israel 60 years ago means the catastrophe (al nakba in Arabic).

  • Jun 21, 2008

‘Sock It To Me Baby’ and other Dr. Scholl’s tales | Jim Freeman

As I age, somewhere to the left of graciously, I find it amusing that I have, in recent years, begun to sacrifice style for function. Maybe after developing one’s own style, it is less necessary to borrow the alleged style of others. Last Wednesday, after successfully solo laundromating in that city north of us that none of us want to be seen in, I journeyed by Big 5 to say “hello” to Diane. A few months back, when I last made an emergency run to Wally World for mindless gifts, I purchased my first ever pair of Dr. Scholl’s shoes from her. Either my feet are swelling as I age or my fourth-grade socks no longer fit.

Tuning in to ‘This week on South Whidbey’ | Jim Freeman

Jim Freeman says thanks again for showing up.

BETWEEN CLASSES: We’ll miss our island’s special gems

Growing up on Whidbey has shaped us “island kids” in inescapable ways.

MONKEY THINK, MONKEY WRITE: Roundtable agrees: It’s a sad, sad day indeed

Being a member of the media elite, I often get called down from my ivory tower to help out on blue ribbon commissions, scholarly task forces and such.

  • May 31, 2008

MONKEY THINK, MONKEY WRITE: Some people just don’t appreciate my expertise

Live and learn. Some people just don’t know how to keep their eyes on the prize.

  • May 28, 2008

MONKEY THINK, MONKEY WRITE: It’s too hard to take sides in the polygamy case

It’s been one rotten headline after another this past week.

  • May 24, 2008

BETWEEN CLASSES: Culminating project didn’t go over well with the guinea pigs

Thanks to Bush’s “No Child Left Behind” Act, the Washington State Legislature has been compelled to come up with more stringent standards for graduating seniors.

  • May 17, 2008

It’s time we reduce our carbon food-print

I have a slight problem with dyslexia. However, “backward thinking” isn’t always a disadvantage. These days it seems to be helpful in understanding environmental issues, like the current global food crisis.

  • May 17, 2008

Help make next ‘Celebrate America’ one great festival

It is hard to believe that the Fourth of July is right around the corner. Celebrate America, which takes place on the third of July each year, has become a fixture in our community and gives thousands of people a chance to celebrate freedom and pride in our country in a safe, family, fun atmosphere.

  • May 10, 2008

MONKEY THINK, MONKEY WRITE: There’s plenty of places to see on this campaign tour

John McCain, my friend, has been on the road a lot lately. If you’ve been following the news, you know he is now embarked on what he has named his “Forgotten Places Tour.”

  • Apr 29, 2008

Here’s what you can do for us, Congressman

Recently I received an e-mail from Congressmen Rick Larsen asking how he can help me. I created this list as a guideline for bills he could introduce or co-sponsor and ways to allocate funding. If we want to have a chance of offering our children a future that is remotely like our own lives I believe we will need to start down the path set out below.

  • Apr 23, 2008

To be completely unambiguous: We need to talk!

“Good morning readers!” Or, “Good afternoon,” if you happen to be reading on the East Coast. How was your week? How was your month? How have you been? We’ve been troubled. Troubled by what we have been reading in our local paper about our grandest Island County treasure.

  • Mar 3, 2007

Grumpy old men and other random discords

One of our undercover field reporters, a retired fighter pilot who prefers to be anonymous (can that be achieved on South Whidbey?) tipped this overinformed columnist of some big gossip overheard at the Community Thrift Store last week.

  • Feb 24, 2007

Honesty may just be the missing policy

Given that tomorrow begins the world’s celebration of the Chinese New Year, let us honor the boars in our own lives as we join hands and hearts upon entering The Year of the Boar. Please note that a “boar” or pig is not necessarily a bore.

  • Feb 17, 2007

Valentine’s Day “sonnets” for the humor-deprived

Top of the morning, mates. Or, if you are Down Under, where “mate” is more commonly used, bottom of the morning. Please enjoy this Valentine’s remembrance shared with me by my family in honor of our beloved parents.

  • Feb 10, 2007

Running with scissors: I’m a clip artist at heart

One of the benefits of being a licensed counselor is that I am able to penetrate the guise of my own emotions, subcutaneous my feelings, and then delve into my belief system. Don’t you love the word “delve?”

  • Feb 3, 2007