Pleasant holiday greetings on this first Saturday between Thanksgiving and Christmas, unless you are reading this on Tuesday, which is no big deal because it was written last Wednesday.

I tried to make that last long sentence into two short ones, but my modifiers appeared to be dangling, so I backed off.

Of course, now I have just ended a sentence with a preposition, which used to get us kids English detention back in the ‘60s. Now it’s OK to pierce your face and wear your black, baggie pants around your kneecaps, and you don’t even have to know how to spell.

Speaking of kneecaps, last week I almost lost my patella to a flying filing cabinet.

Ever the helper when I should be doing something else, I helped Mike the Mayor, Mayor of Holmes Harbor, move a couple pieces of furniture from his mom and dad’s June Beach basement.

Instead of asking operative questions like where are the steps and where is the dolly, I lifted the filing cabinet off the dolly while Mayor Mike pulled the handcart backwards up the stairs.

Not unlike David and Goliath or a lightweight boxer facing a middleweight, I fell backwards down the stairs as the filing cabinet used me as a surfboard along the wood and subsequent concrete.

This was as close as I will ever get to stunting like Yakima Canutt in an old John Wayne western.

Fortunately, I sometimes fall backward better than forward, particularly when I do not know the fall is coming.

Imagine a tall, skinny Olga Corbet flipping backward with a filing cabinet as a partner instead of a gymnastics horse.

Which reminds me of Frannie Johnson’s line: “Remember, Ginger Rogers did everything that Fred Astaire did, only she did it backwards and in high heels.”

Yes, thankful we are this week.

Thankful that our confrontation with a four-drawered steel file cabinet resulted in a loss of blood, but not a loss of mobility.

Thankful that we have never had to be airlifted to St. Joseph’s Hospital in Bellingham to the tune of $9,800 bucks and some change.

Thankful that we did not have to eat the same food that the Pilgrims ate at their first Thanksgiving. Goodies like duck, goose, eels, and wild plums with wine chasers.

Thankful that we were not the cow in 1740 France that was found guilty of sorcery and publicly hanged.

Thankful that we do not have to act like Beethoven and pour ice water over our head to stimulate our brain.

Yes, we are most thankful and gracious this week.

Thankful that we have not had our storage shed looted and our parents’ memories sold.

Thankful that we do not have a storage shed.

Thankful that we are still vertical even though sometimes we feel horizontal.

Thankful that we have our health, our heat and our hearts.

Life is pretty incredible until that bump in the road or that conflict between the ears kicks in.

Then whadaya gonna do?

We all have our methods.

Some of us eat chocolate.

Some of us just eat.

Some of us pray.

Some of us yell at our family.

Some of us get yelled at by our friends.

Some of us play pull-tabs.

Some of us push buttons.

Some of us, like the Marine Corps League, give thousands of dollars of toys to kids here on South Whidbey.

The Marines have landed.

Be watching this space for more details about the giving nature of our local detachment. Semper Fi, Gentlemen!

Finally, this invitation to those of you who have felt that you have never had a real voice in the biggest party of the year, the Island County Fair.

Continuing the tradition of public involvement and non-partisanship of this community, I invite you to submit to me in writing via e-mail or regular 39-cent stamp mail your suggestions for the entertainment at next year’s party.

Want to see the Timebenders again?

Done deal. The Timebenders, the good time gurus of retro rock ‘n roll, will be back for their 10th year on Sunday, Aug. 19.

Want to see and hear Roy Orbison, Dolly Parton, Elvis, Merle Haggard or Tina Turner?

Me, too.

But what about their impersonators?

Remember Marty Davis?

He’s still around and country rockin’.

How about your favorite Island County performers?

Let us know who and where they are.

We invite your write-in vote. And your candidate does not even have to be certified.

Drop me your suggestions at fun@whidbey.com or to PO Box 996 in Freeland, 98249.

Your input is needed and appreciated.

Want to serve on the entertainment committee? Perks galore.

What kind of objectivity and open-minded perception can you bring to the table?

Representatives of all ages are being sought from Camano and Whidbey, in Oak Harbor, Coupeville, Greenbank and the southend of Whidbey.

This is your fair.

Want to help?

In the meantime, we’ll thank you kindly until you are better paid.

Thanks for reading.

Now, back to the turkey sandwiches and leftover brown gravy.

Jim Freeman can be reached all too easily at fun@whidbey.com