County GOP’s rejection of election results was ‘certifiable’


Last Thursday, the Island County Republican Party “overwhelmingly” adopted a resolution by Beth Munson: “The Island County Republican Party of Washington State formally rejects the certified results of the 2020 Presidential election, and we hold that acting President Joseph Robinette Biden Jr., was not legitimately elected by the people of the United States.”

This is a milestone in the history of our county and country. For starters, I’m grateful that the local GOP made its rejection “formal.” It sounds like everyone dressed for the occasion! When you seek to overturn the democratic process, the proper etiquette is evening wear.

Kudos to the local Republicans for their timing. The best way to hold an election is, vote first, then wait 21 months and ask Island County Republicans what they think. There’s no result so final that it cannot be reconsidered. Should Ivan Drago be declared the winner of “Rocky IV”? Who really won the Battle of Hastings in the year 1066? What say you, Beth Munson?

Notice how last Thursday’s resolution is laser-focused: it only rejects the “certified” results of the election. It leaves open any number of uncertified results. In political terms, this is called “thinking outside the ballot box.”

The GOP does not say what uncertified election results they’d accept, so let’s think creatively. Why not select the leader of the free world with a coin flip? Let’s try it. Coin’s in the air. Heads Trump wins, tails it’s … damn. Tails. Best two out of three?

The GOP’s resolution is not perfect. Its reference to Biden as “acting president” is an insult to history’s greatest acting president, Ronald Reagan, who had starring roles in “Knute Rockne, All American” and “Bedtime for Bonzo.” Biden did have a cameo appearance in TV’s “Parks and Recreation.” But if that’s acting, then the work of Kirk Cameron, Sarah Jessica Parker and at least two Kardashians is also acting, and I don’t think I care to live in that world.

The resolution’s strongest point is where it “holds” that Biden “was not legitimately elected by the people of the United States.” Clarity! Our local GOP admits, Biden was elected by the people. He just wasn’t legitimately elected by the people. Not everything people do is legitimate. Take Trump University. Trump Steaks. Trump Airlines.

How can you tell when people are acting legitimately? When the people elected Trump in 2016 by giving him 3 million fewer votes than Clinton, that’s legitimate. (To those who point out that Clinton got more votes, remember: The election was legitimate because it was certified by the Electoral College!) But when the people elected Biden in 2020 by giving him 7 million more votes than Trump, that’s not legitimate, and no Electoral College certification can make it so.

Any questions?

If the logic escapes you, try this: Americans value freedom of belief. If you believe that the president is whoever local Republican leaders say it is, then that’s your God-given right, God help you. And if I believe that democracy ends when enough of you refuse to accept reality, that’s my right too.

In any event, local Republicans have spoken, and there’s nothing left for Biden but to pack his things and take the next Amtrak back to Delaware. Historians will judge the Biden years (months?), while the rest of us anxiously await Beth Munson’s choice for our next president, pope and American Idol.

Larry Behrendt