ALL ABOARD | Ancient Mariners and other amazing stories of old

Now that the Mariners are in Spring Training, we can all look forward to the Puget Sound’s Hall of Fame voice Dave Niehaus and the Hall of Humor style of Rick Rizz, Dave’s longtime sidekick.

Last year’s best Rizz moment was during inter-league play when the Mariners were up to bat against the National League’s LA Dodger pitcher Derek Lowe, first drafted by Seattle in the eighth round of the 1991 amateur draft.

“The pitch from Lowe is high.”

I bet Rick was up all night thinking on that one.

Delayed kudos of praise to Farrah Manning, clinical aesthetician with Island Medical Spa of Anacortes and Coupeville, for donating a facial during our recent “Arts, Hearts and Hammers” auction at the Bayview Corner. She also did a marvelous job as our Vanna.

If you missed the auction fun on Feb. 6, The Open Door Gallery + Coffee has generously extended several auction items until the end of the month.

Amazing creations are still available.

Have you been amazed lately?

No, not because of the economy, but because of just being amazed, like

I was last weekend at WICA enjoying the philosophical antics of “Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead.”

According to one of the Websters, in one of their abridged editions, to be amazed is to be “filled with wonder” or “to be astounded.”

Originally, according to the wordsmiths, “amazement” involved confusion, bewilderment or perplexity.

Sounds like my first day in ninth grade.

Or my first high school reunion when I realized

I was finally taller than Judy Gerwig.

How could this be? The only time I could ever look her in the eye in high school I had to be on a choir riser.

I was amazed once at the Houston airport when I saw retired NFL great Johnny Unitas, the Golden Arm, walking the concourse, carrying his luggage, head down, like a beaten warrior.

Then I remembered that was the same look Johnny had hunched over the Baltimore Colts’ centers.

Amazement spiked my blood vessels in the Marine Corps when I realized, while watching the ticking of the second hand on the Quaker State Motor Oil clock at the Parris Island Boot Camp Barber Shop, that my head could be shaved completely bald in less than 30 seconds.

Hardly time to read a magazine or get to know your barber.

Every Friday for eight weeks my head was shaved bald.

Like my hair had grown in seven days?

Hair does not grow when you are afraid.

I should have saved the designated 75 cents a week drawn automatically from my monthly military monies, without my permission, for my hair removal.

Had I saved that 75 cents each of those weeks, and continued to invest wisely in mutual funds, government bonds, T-bills and baseball cards, I would not only have a lot more money today,

I would have a lot more hair.

Well, maybe not a lot more.

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